May 8: Some Maurice Thoughts

[kinetic_elaboration]

Not a great today: too tired and just didn’t feel like I had myself together. At least there’s only one day left in the week. And my vacation is coming up. I’m in denial about it but it is coming up and probably quite needed.

I’m not going to finish Maurice as soon as I thought because I’ve been slowing down in my reading. This is partly because of distractions and partly because there are sections that require a lot of contemplation. That’s okay though. No rush.

A few very quick thoughts:

I am enjoying how deeply relatable it is especially the second time around. In particular I think it really captures the queer experience of feeling separated from most people because their world isn’t made for you and you understand things they don’t. And the sad parts of this as well.

I really like how a major thesis of this book is that Maurice would not only be much more boring as a straight person, he would also just be a worse person. His sexuality actually, literally does make him better than others of his type. The boldness it took to write that in 1915.

I still don’t entirely know what to make of Clive’s ‘conversion.’ I mostly think he’s a deeply (deeply!) repressed gay man but the way it’s written is so odd. What phenomenon is this supposed to be depicting?

I remember thinking before that this book was good but not his masterpiece but upon this reading… I mean I’m not saying better than A Passage to India (would need to reread it), but I do think my past self underestimated it. I think there’s actually so much there and I want to read it over and over to peel back all the layers.