October 22: Five Things

[kinetic_elaboration]

Caught up on my sleep today! At the wrong time. I am not feeling terrible at the moment; however, I need to go back to bed.

Five random things:

1. Had food truck lunch today which meant I ate sooo much and then had to sit around at my desk digesting like a snake that’s swallowed its victim whole, but at least it got me to write an email I’d been avoiding writing.
2. Finished the Ligotti story; it did stick the ending for me and then it left me with a lot of half-formed thoughts I haven’t really been excavating. The theme of fate and a lack of control etc etc really doesn’t do anything for me, and it’s a fairly obvious one but I feel like there’s something something art/artists/artistry there too, which I like more.
3. I still don’t care for soundtracks and there are really one 5-6 songs I like off the Tron soundtrack but As Alive As You Need to Be IS the song of the year for me, I’m just not getting tired of it.
4. I’ve been beating back these tendrils of self-negative talk lately… I keep telling myself ‘do you dislike yourself or do you just need sleep?’ Because I mean, I am doing the things. Mostly. The most important things. The unkind words have this… sort of unreal sheen to them, like I know they’re coming from an untrustworthy place so I just beat them back with a broom.
5. I have been finding every excuse in the world not to write, though. I do feel bad about that. UGH. I hate how hard it is to re-start habits once they’ve faltered.